At Least One Major U.K. Paper Wants to Believe Ruby Talked to Oswald

Schutze was just telling me the story about the time he dug up Lee Harvey Oswald. Actually, Jim wasn’t holding the shovel — maybe you recall that in 1981, a British researcher named Michael Eddowes claimed there was a “second Lee Harvey Oswald” and got locals to yank Oswald’s body outta the ground from the Rose Hill Cemetery in Fort Worth. “I remember jumping the fence at the cemetery,” Schutze was saying, “and sneaking through the headstones, only to find Channel 8 already at the grave site. My own theory was that they’d find up to three Lee Harvey Oswalds in the coffin.” Imagine how disappointed he was to find just the one. “As conspiracy theories go, however, I feel like I should be given a mulligan on that one,” adds Lee Harvey Schutze.

What prompted this trip down Amnesia Lane this morning? What do you think: the discovery of the JFK assassination artifacts by Craig Watkins, including the transcript of the Oswald-Jack Ruby chitchat that, c’mon, never took place except in some screenwriter’s Z-movie imagination. Only, again, don’t mention that to the Brits: In the Telegraph‘s breathless version of the story, posted a short while ago, a brief mention of the movie’s buried way, way down — far beneath the section that reads, “The transcript claims that the real target of the organised crime groups was the president’s brother the Attorney General Robert Kennedy who had launched a campaign against the underworld. It was felt that killing the president would be easier and that his demise would also take down his brother.” Me, I think this is all some elaborate Presidents’ Day joke. –Robert Wilonsky