Go on, flame us

Go on, flame us: It's been a busy few weeks here at Buzz central, as we've been doing our part to help put together the massive Best of Dallas issue you hold in your hands. It's a lot of work, and it's not over yet. Now comes the part where readers, advertisers and others write or call in to tell us how dumb we are. "You gave Best One-Legged, Left-Handed Bartender to him?" they'll say. "You idiots. Everyone knows the [insert your favorite one-legged, left-handed bartender here] is the best hopping southpaw drink-slinger in town. Geez."

You think we're kidding? Look, we didn't actually give a Best One-Legged etc. to anyone, but odds are now good that someone will read this and write in asking us where the hell that blurb was. So, before anyone gets all het up, allow Buzz to explain: "Best" is a highly subjective term. The only wrong answer to the question "which is best" is the one you disagree with. We admit it: You're right. We were wrong. No need to flame us. (Oh, and for all you businesses out there who tried to stuff the readers' pick ballots again: Nice try, but we do tend to get suspicious when, say, the same restaurant is chosen for Best Indian Food, Best French Fries and Best Place to Buy Men's Clothing. If you're going to cheat, at least put a little effort into it, 'kay?)

Now, we'd like tell you that we came up with our recommendations in a highly scientific manner, visiting every contender and carefully weighing the factors behind each decision like a jury deciding a death penalty case. In fact, we would tell you that, but our editor will allow Buzz to lie only so much, so here's the truth: What you have in your hands are merely the opinions of 25 or so people, ages 20-something to 40-something, who like to drink, shop and go out a lot. A whole lot. In fact, we're kinda surprised that no one offered up a Best Alcoholics Anonymous Meeting, Best STD Clinic or Best Credit Counselor. Our recommendations may just be our opinions, but when it comes to eating, carousing and consumerism, they're well-informed opinions.

So take them for what they're worth. Maybe check out a few of our recommended spots. If you find we've directed you to an undiscovered gem and happen to see a pale, writerly type getting sloshed in a corner while eating something thoroughly unhealthy, offer him or her a toast--or a beer. They're doing it for you. Somewhat. --Patrick Williams

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Patrick Williams is editor-in-chief of the Dallas Observer.
Contact: Patrick Williams