If Only Eliot Spitzer Had Met This Former Dallas-Based “Former Independent Escort” First

An actual photo of Amanda Brooks. No, really, an actual photo. This ain’t the paper version of Unfair Park, dig?

The Dallas Morning News really blew its interview with Amanda Brooks — you recall, the “former independent escort and stripper in Dallas” quoted in the high-priced hooker piece (and you do remember your first high-priced hooker piece, doncha?) about Eliot Spitzer’s spitting the bit. She did provide us with one of the greatest quotes ever — and, really, Amanda, we’re looking to split the dough on those “Dallas: The One-Hour Town” tees and thongs. But instead of asking Brooks about the state of the top-dollar trim ’round town, the paper should have asked her what lessons we can learn from the New York governor’s downfall. (Besides, she tells Unfair Park today, she hasn’t lived in Dallas siince 2004, so she’s not up-to-date on that scene.)

Blessedly, after spending way too much time trolling Brooks’ site this morning — for someone else, swear — we discovered the blog the now-Cali-based Brooks writes in association with her Internet Escort’s Handbook Book 1: The Foundation (a sequel’s forthcoming). And, sure enough, there ’tis right on top — the item “Lessons From Spitzer.” And it can be summed up real quick: “Don’t use agencies.” And, “Don’t use agencies.” And, “Don’t use agencies.” Also, “Don’t use agencies.” Worth a read. And I’d also like to use this opportunity to say hello to Unfair Park regulars I like to call “Mom” and “Dad.” –Robert Wilonsky