To my eyes, second-year tight end Martellus Bennett is the early star of training camp. And I'm not just saying that because he stole the show with his impromptu rapping at The Dallas Observer Music Awards last month.
He's making all of us in San Antonio forget about Marty B TV and his getting fined for one profane video and causing a ruckus with another black stereotype offering. When Bennett dwarfs a safety in coverage and effortlessly plucks the ball out of the air, all I can think about is Antonio Gates.
"He doesn't have to progress any more," head coach Wade Phillips actually said Monday afternoon in The Alamodome. "Just keep playing the way he's playing."
The Marty B iPhone App comes out in four days. But, for now, Bennett is concentrating on football. And that's not easy for an alien.
Wait, a what? ...
Before he donned an Oakland A's cap - hey, shitty karma! - for a San Antonio TV appearance last night, Bennett yesterday wore a T-shirt under his pads that read, I swear:
"Marty B The Martian."
The following is an actual conversation. No herbal enhancements were present.
Me: So, you're a Martian?
Marty B: Yep ... from Jupiter.
Me: A Martian from Jupiter? Interesting. I'm gonna regret this, but I'm in a good mood so why not? So, how'd you get here?
Marty B: In an egg. I'm the only mammal ever born in an egg. I broke through the placenta.
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Me: Mmmmkay. So, how about that football huh? Two-a-days. And stuff.
Marty B: Practices aren't tough on me. I got these moon rocks. Put them in the bath with me. For energy.
Phillips, who has been coaching the NFL for 33 years, was asked how often he's come across a personality like Bennett.