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Sandwiched between reports of strangulations, strikings and stolen cars on Saturday’s Dallas Police Department crime report is this item from the Fiesta at 9727 Webb Chapel Road in Northwest Dallas: “AP ATE A CHOCOLATE DONUT AND LEFT WITHOUT PAYING FOR IT.” And, yes, “AP” means the guy was arrested — though, more than likely, the guilty party received a citation from an officer, same difference. And the cost of the purloined pastry? Forty-five cents. Seems like an excellent use of everyone’s hard-earned. –Robert Wilonsky