Jessica Simpson is Great Success in Ukraine, Like Barbie Doll

Nothing refreshes the taste buds like a little Jessica Simpson … um … news? Like, see, yesterday we mentioned her forthcoming trip to Kuwait, where she’s to perform for the troops (like they asked). Well, today comes “news” that, like, the Ukrainians would love for Tony Romo’s girl to pay ’em a visit — because, after all, they did make her big flop of a film, Blonde Ambition, a hit — to the tune, no shit, of more than a quarter million dollars, which comes out to … carry the three … add the four … a quarter million dollars more than it made during it week-long Texas run, give or take.

So now the Ukrainian Film Commission’s trying to get her to pay a visit, according to In Touch. Says movie producer Alex Shpiluk, “She is really the ideal of American beauty and style, like Barbie. She would be useful to us and our image.” Which is the opposite of what Tony Romo probably said the day they got back from Mexico. –Robert Wilonsky