Not So Pretty

It’s official: Bravo ain’t got shit on Tyra Banks. At least, not after the first episode of Make Me A Supermodel. From the hosts (awkward Niki Taylor and Tyson Beckford) to the challenges to the in-house interactions, the show was as dull as the granny-panty photos in the Sears catalog.

At least Plano girl Stephanie fared well. She impressed Tyson (“She just nailed it.”) and fashion photog Lee Strickland during a spring clothing shoot in a freezing Times Square (“One hit … a really good shot”). She looked a bit like a younger, gentler-ridden Scarlett Johansson, and had a good attitude despite the cold. Later, during a bizarre, “throw your clothes in a hobo fire to prove you’re dedicated” bit with Tyson, she felt a bit of a conflict as she was wearing many of her Ma’s duds. I suspect there’s a back story there — unfortunately, I just don’t know if the show can hold my attention long enough to hear it.

For you Friends who missed the inaugural episode, here’s a quick summary: some seriously irritating models, it’s cold in NYC, Tyson wears parka, Niki garbles lines, hot guy has broken foot, ace female has thong protest (um, you’re a model), gawky girl makes most pretentious statement ever (“I’ve always been an extremely creative person; I just came out of the womb loving art.”), Tyson in bikini, swimsuit catwalk, other non-Plano blond exposed as having freakishly long torso. Oh, and Zoolander reference/joke count: one . That’s pretty much all you need. –Merritt Martin