The Battle of the Bulge

“And you call yourself a Bowie fan?!” This was the reaction I received when it was brought to public attention (and by “public,” I mean a staff lunch) that I had never seen the 1986 children’s fantasy film Labyrinth. Having now seen it, I frankly don’t feel “children’s” is an…

Being There

Wilco has been my favorite band since I was about 15, so needless to say I bought Jeff Tweedy’s solo DVD the week it came out, like a proper fanboy. Therefore you probably won’t catch me watching Sunken Treasure: Live in the Pacific Northwest 9 p.m. Wednesday at the AllGood…

High Times

Some people just have no shame, flaunting their bad habits for all to see. Like coke ‘n’ roll super-couple Kate Moss and Pete Doherty, who recently started rival scab collections. And Nicole Richie, who went from curvy to scurvy in about two weeks, like we were going to believe any…

Old Gold

Lots of people enjoy Antiques Roadshow, but it’s just too nerve-racking for me. An episode may have 10 heartwarming, diamond-in-the-rough stories, but it takes just one earnest senior citizen finding out that their precious Ming vase is actually an $18 Sears Roebuck reproduction to ruin my night. Luckily, there will…

The Chronic What?

Starting at 2 p.m. Sunday, spend your afternoon in a dream world of magic at Narnia: The Musical, now showing at Casa Mañana Theatre, 3101 W. Lancaster Ave. in Fort Worth. I would love to see them dropping Hamiltons and visiting Magnolia to munch on some cupcakes, but I think…

Jazz Masters

If you want to start a fight (not that we’d condone it), head to Denton this weekend and proclaim loudly how lousy the arts scene is there. Be warned, though. You will find yourself receiving the business end of a sausage-on-a-stick mighty quick because The Denton Arts and Jazz Festival…

Prostitute Passing

They’re either lying or just laying a good joke on us. Last time I checked my dictionary, besides the obligatory listing for the “oldest living professionals,” prostitute was defined as a person who debases himself by misusing his talents in offering unworthy goods to the public. Poke your head in…

Texas Pride

Here’s an idea: Have an event featuring a couple of days of rodeo topped with a bull-riding invitational. Feature music from Jason Boland and the Stragglers, Kevin Fowler Band, Blake Shelton and many others. Call it the Real. Texas. Festival. This is a great idea from a marketing standpoint, but…

Cha(Red)able

People these days are becoming obsessed with color—in a good way, since it lets you know what part of the body you’re supposed to be caring about. Yellow? That’s for balls. Pink? That’s for boobs. Red? That’s for the whole, head-to-toe shebang, since red is the patron color of HIV/AIDS…

He Will Survive

Oh, the sweet smell of the late 1980s. That wet-wool smell that became “grunge.” It bled like a skater-kid’s skinned knee into the early 1990s, and as soon as Nirvana “appeared from nowhere” in 1991, major labels descended upon every band with long hair, a Big Muff pedal and songs…

G-G-G-George

Remember that weird time in the ’80s when white people doing blues was all cool? What was up with that? Perhaps the most well-known of the top-40 bluesmen was George Thorogood, who was, indeed, quite thorough when it came to diggin’ out some old-school Delta inspiration and even better at…

Miles Per Hour

For decades, the story of my sister learning to drive involved the Freemasons library parking lot in Waco, a giant tank of an automobile and either Uncle Jack or Aunt Donna as the instructor. It was a great package, often told in various incarnations with exaggerated anecdotes, but it always,…

Small Hands

One time, I pissed off a carny. He ran this ride called The Paratroopers with these swings that just went round and round and swooped up and down for what seemed like forever. I thought it would be cool. My motion sickness did not think it was cool. And then…

Shutter Show

Once upon a time, photographers shot with something called film, and telephones were for talking on, not taking pictures with. Before digital photography flashed onto the scene, capturing images meant trekking to the store to buy film or flash cubes and even hand-printing photographs in a darkroom. From oatmeal-box pinhole…

The Goldberg Standard

A respected television reporter for CBS News for a generation, Bernard Goldberg wrote about a perceived liberal bias in the media in his best-seller Bias. Although the book included several compelling anecdotes that corroborated parts of his premise, Bias read more like a collection of rants to bring up in…

Watch Out!

If I’m accepted into the Institute for Interesting People, would that validate me as an interesting person? I wonder. But my wallet doesn’t wonder so much, and he calls all the shots. For those who are interesting (and paying for it) and are parents, consider this: A man after my…

The Big Sip

I long for the day when someone with an Austin mentality decides to bring a movie roadshow to Big D a la the Alamo Drafthouse. A big, roving movie screen set up in the park for all to watch under the starry night? Count me in. I’d do it, but…

Do Tell

“Living history” such as Dallas Heritage Village kind of freaks me out. I will never understand costumed characters who talk funny, churn butter and act like they’ve never heard of television. But here’s something you should know: Kids eat this stuff up. Well, this weekend there’s going to be a…

Joyeux Anniversaire

The key to a great birthday party is a cool host. That, and the presence of alcohol. The super-cool people of La Reunion have all that covered for their big birthday blowout this weekend. Celebrating their first anniversary, the nonprofit has been a force in the Dallas art scene, inspiring…

Humid Holidays

Having sat through more than my fair share of performances of The Nutcracker, I can think of a few things that would make the ballet more interesting. For one, if Mother Ginger hid something more exciting under her skirt (like, say, cougars), it might spice things up a bit. But…

What’s Your Gauge?

The old-fashioned quilting bee had a lot to recommend it: skilled women trading gossip and sewing tips and a tad of wisdom when called for. The Lakewood Knitwits have exchanged batting and tying for skipping and purling, but the theory is the same: conversation and busy fingers. The Knitwits host…

Arresting Development

For all the huzzahs deservedly heaped upon 2004’s Shaun of the Dead, in which it took a good long while to discern the living from the walking deceased, the zombie-flick spoof was little more than an extended sketch taken, oh, 19 minutes beyond its breaking point. But the movie, created…