I’m afraid to admit that I may not be the best person to write up this German Christmas Festival. I say that because so much of it seems to revolve around German food. A live holiday pastry demonstration, grilled bratwurst for sale, a 16,000-square-foot European grocery store—all of which have…
For most people, Thanksgiving is synonomous with heaping plates of food, awkward political conversations and small talk with Aunt Betty. The only exercise involved is usually getting up for seconds or working the remote control. Not for those intrepid, early-rising Turkey Trotters. If you want to join their ranks, there’s…
Ah, Spanky. You must be ready for a career in show business when you choose a name such as Spanky. The bald-headed comedian, now on his “Men Are Sluts” tour (ooh, that title’s got me cracking up already), was also a…wait for it…finalist on Star Search. Yeah, you read that…
Mrs. Cratchit is such a slut. That woman obviously can’t keep her legs together, what with the 40,000 kids she’s crammed into the tiny Cratchit hovel. Of course, Bob Cratchit is no better. Are there no suitable ladies of the night willing to lie still for a shilling or two?…
The holiday season officially begins on Thanksgiving Day. Despite all the Target and Old Navy commercials, despite the fact that Starbucks employees have been donning their seasonal red shirts for weeks now, and despite that house off of Live Oak and Munger that has had festive Christmas lights up since…
OMG! U guyz r like totally not gunna believe this, but if ur over 21, u kan totally get CHEEP DRINKZ @ Kismet Lounge if ur MySpace friends with them! It’s like, MySpace iz totally kewl and Kismet iz totally kewl, so if u put them 2gether, u get one…
At some moment in childhood I pitched over the line of wanting dolls and guns and games for Christmas to being thrilled by unwrapping a book. Mark Twain, O. Henry, Nancy Drew. OK, I was a weird kid. But I give books at Christmas now because, well, how many sweaters…
All right, I admit it. If Patrick Swayze shows up in a movie on cable, I will watch it. Dirty Dancing, Road House, Three Wishes, Black Dog—seen it, seen it, seen it, seen it. How can someone be so bad and yet so good? Chalk it up to Swayze magic…
How many ways can the Cinderella story be told? I bet you’ve never seen it panto. First introduced in England in 1717, a traditional British pantomime isn’t silent. It’s an interactive form of theater with songs, jokes and lots of slapstick as the audience cheers for the hero and hisses…
I was convinced that boxing was the workout I needed to sculpt my body beautiful, but I wasn’t convinced that those girly kickboxing classes at my gym packed the necessary punch. That’s when I found Vivero Boxing Gym in north Oak Cliff—it’s the real deal. The workouts were grueling, and…
Kids’ visits to Santa bring two things to mind: A Christmas Story’s psycho workaholic Santa who dashes Ralphie’s dream of a Red Ryder BB gun, and the long lines of whining kids and bored parents filling the malls at Christmastime. If your child must see Santa, your best bet might…
Critics and fans went ape-poo over Imogen Heap’s vocoder-drenched 2004 single “Hide and Seek,” a melancholy song that spoke more of mopey bedroom recording than big-budget knob-fiddling, though it used its fair share of technology. “Hide and Seek” was lauded for good reason: The tune, with its take-your-time tempo and…
Velveteen Rabbit is pissed: PlayStation 3 is here, Barbie’s Dream House is now three stories tall, and Tickle Me Elmo learned Spanish. How’s a bunny supposed to compete? The only “features” he brings to the table are that he’s made of knockoff velvet and could give you scarlet fever. You…
November in Dallas—brisk autumn air, falling leaves, work slows down as the holidays speed up and conspiracy theorists and local news networks gear up for arguably the city’s most important holiday—November 22, the anniversary of the assassination of John F. Kennedy in 1963. That may seem blasphemous, but there’s no…
By all rights, 2002’s Die Another Day should have been and could have been the final James Bond film. It was packaged like a cynical, weary best-of concert coughed up by an aging dinosaur, offering copious nods to the franchise’s past without bothering to offer any new material of consequence…
For Your Consideration pulls off the neat trick of skewering the movie industry while remaking it in its own image. The latest ensemble comedy by Christopher Guest and company may take place in Los Angeles, but its imaginative provenance lies somewhere between the la-la lands of Entourage and Mulholland Dr…
Fast Food Nation, directed by Richard Linklater from Eric Schlosser’s 2001 best-selling exposé of the McDonald’s conspiracy, is an anti-commercial. It’s designed to kill desire and deprogram the viewer’s appetite. Linklater—who, along with Steven Soderbergh and Gus Van Sant, has staked out a particular outpost on the indie-studio border—here takes…
Revenge is for suckers,” says Henry Gondorff, Paul Newman’s character in The Sting. Among con artists the rule is you get stung, you move on. Don’t try to get even. Because if the grifter is good, you’ll end up getting taken all over again. That’s just about what happens to…
Forbidden Planet (Warner Bros.) Long available as faded discount product, Fred McLeod Wilcox’s 1956 masterpiece–the movie without which Star Trek, Star Wars, 2001, and, oh, Lost in Space wouldn’t exist–at last gets its proper due; this double-disc collection comes with everything but stardust and rocket fuel. The tale of a…
Final Fantasy is to role-playing games as the Yankees are to baseball. The series — now almost 20 years old — practically redefined the genre with Final Fantasy VII on the original PlayStation, the first console RPG that captured a mainstream audience in the States. But FF was a victim…
Brothers of the Head (IFC) Cary Grant: The Franchise Collection (Universal) CSI: The Complete Sixth Season (Paramount) Cream: Royal Albert Hall (Rhino) 49 Up (First Run) Friends: The Complete Series Collection (Warner Bros.) The Green Mile: Two-Disc Special Edition (Warner Bros.) Hate Crime (Image) He Changed Our World: Steve Irwin…
So it’s Christmas. Wait! No, it’s not even Thanksgiving yet, but every grocery store and mall tells us it’s time to celebrate that most wonderful time of the year—early and often. So while you’re at it, the Great Russian Nutcracker is one of the better ways to get in the…
