This Just In: Dallas Ain’t All Too Smart

Try to follow along. Which, if you’re a City of Dallas leader or a Dallas Independent School District accountant, will be mondo difficult. First, because some bozos don’t know how to subtract the 4 and carry the 1, DISD announces a $64 million shortfall. That’s shortfall. Opposite of windfall. Blamed…

D’oh, Doughmoney!

For those stocking up on Ike supplies that aren’t batteries or bourbon, here’s a suggestion: Snag the last of the goodies ever made by the Doughmonkeys in Snider Plaza. Because, yes, as Bill Addison noted late yesterday, once again and for reals this time, my boy’s favorite bakery in the…

Now, Where’s My Kite?

For those so interested, this is the latest wind (and rain and tornado potential) forecast from the National Weather Service — and note the exclamation mark. And the NWS no like Ike: “Develop a personal hurricane plan,” it advises in its latest forecast. Mine involves a trip to the liquor…

Are You Ready For Some (Monday Night) Football?

Cowboys. Eagles. Monday Night Football. September. All that’ll be missing is these guys. Remember September? I do. Especially when the Dallas Cowboys played on Monday Night Football. I know, it’s not the same these days on ESPN as it was in the glory days back on ABC, but it’s still…

Broken Cogs

Mike Howard couldn’t take it anymore. For the past month, the young attorney had been shouldering a caseload he had never imagined possible when he was a law student at Southern Methodist University. This morning—a sweltering day in mid-August—was a perfect example. Sitting in the Frank Crowley Courts Building, he…

Goin’ to the Chapel

Goin’ to the chapel: If Buzz were introspective, we would pause and contemplate the creeping conservatism that has overtaken us in middle age. It’s the thing that causes a vein to throb in our temple as we cry, “Oh, come on!” whenever we hear about the latest expenditure of tax…

Chin Music

Bruised ribs. Stitched chin. Multiple penalties. Super start. In last Sunday’s NFL season opener in Cleveland, the Dallas Cowboys were missing two of their top four receivers, their starting left guard and a Pro Bowl cornerback. They didn’t, however, miss a beat. In their most dominant debut in 10 years,…

DISD’s $64 Million Budget Shortfall Caused By “Inadequate Budgeting”

Intern Courtney’s at 3700 Ross Avenue this very moment, where district officials have indeed confirmed a sudden $64-million shortfall — in the 2007-’08 budget. How’d this happen? Well, see, it’s “complicated,” said superintendent Michael Hinojosa, the result of having more teachers and support staff in the schools. “The majority of…

ESPN: Now Also Jess-Obsessed

Look, at this point we’re just killing time till the 4 p.m. emergency press conference at DISD HQ on Ross Ave., from which Intern Courtney will likely report back with the bad news that the district’s suddenly “$64 million and change” in the hole, says one source with whom we’ve…

Romo Finally Talks About Jessica

Aren’t they so cuuute together?! Jessica ain’t bad, either. Ramiro Romo, that is. While the quarterback with the stitched-up chin continues an “I don’t talk about my personal life” vow, Tony’s dad opened up a teensy weensy bit to NBC 5’s Newy Scruggs recently. Says pops of son’s girlfriend, “To…

Reiner, Short & Brinker: Not a Law Firm, But a Love Fest

Kristina Bowman Last night’s Carl Reiner-Martin Short showdown at the Morton H. Meyerson Symphony Center was all a little boy raised on teevee could dream for, as Reiner recounted the creation of The Dick Van Dyke show and discussed working on Your Show of Shows while Short explained the genesis…

Jeffrey Yarbrough, Phoenix

Jeffrey Yarbrough, whose Liberty Noodles is still sorely missed A year ago, Jeffrey Yarbrough — the man behind Club Clearview, after its initial success in the mid-1980s, and Liberty Noodles — shared his secret shame with the readers of Forbes Small Business: filing for Chapter 13. His reasons for writing…

Your First Look at W: When George Met Laura

Did someone say W? Because it’s only a matter of weeks now till Oliver Stone’s depictification of “George Bush Jr.” stumbles into megaplexes with its drunk on. And, at last, some real footage from the movie’s shown up all official-like: 1:15 worth of the day George (Josh Brolin) met Laura…

Out House

The Cowboys’ former battering-ram fullback is now also the Cowboys’ former Director of Alumni Affairs. At a time when memories of past Dallas Cowboys regularly come rushing in, former running back Robert Newhouse is out. While trying to track down former players to share their Texas Stadium recollections, it came…