Tee. Zero.

This may be the only time you see Terrell Owens getting behind Drew Bledsoe, because after the loss to Philly yesterday, Owens kinda threw his QB under the bus. Wish he’d taken a tire for the team, as well. Overlooked and underthrown, The Artist Formerly Known as T.O. officially deteriorated…

Better Buck Next Time?

Trey Hillman, currently managing the Nippon-Ham Fighters in Japan, is a candidate for the Rangers’ gig. We were hoping for Foo Fighter Dave Grohl. My Lil’ Rangers birdies this morning are chirpin’ about Trey Hillman being a legit candidate to follow Buck Showalter as Texas Rangers manager. Not surprisingly, you…

Pick Your Pleasure (or Poison)

www.marcusfootball.com With so many obvious sports options in front of ya this weekend, do the unexpected and check out upcoming high-school phenom Matt Faulkner instead? A sports weekend like this comes around only, oh, about once a decade. So many options, so little time. And TVs. If I were you,…

You Win One, You Lose One

It was just two years ago that Buck Showalter was named AL Manager of the Year. Now, he’s the unemployed manager of the week. Tom Hicks’ Dallas Stars got their season off to a rousing start last night with a 3-2 overtime win in, of all places, Colorado. Which begs…

McNabb to Owens…And it’s Dropped

Ya know, seems not so long ago we all kinda hated Terrell Owens and could not have cared less about what he said or did. Ah, the good ol’ days… Can’t wait till Monday, because just the prospect of the Eagles-Cowboys game on Sunday has already turning into a beating…

Sympathy for the Devil

Not that we need much help, but Terrell Owens brings out the worst in all of us. T.O. turns us into baffled skeptics grasping at guesses. Right, fans? After an unprecedented Dallas Cowboys week featuring a clogged throat, sliced thumb and trampled face, Owens raised the most compelling questions. Considering…

They Killed Kenny! (Or Not)

Speaking of former Texas Rangers, seems Kenny Rogers’ anger management issues are alive and well after all. Seems Rogers, who once famously punched a KDFW-Channel 4 cameraman and later sorta apologized, got into a parking lot dust-up with a Detroit Tigers fan. At this point, I guess we’re supposed to…

Pass the Buck

This wasn’t the scene at Tom Hicks’ house last night, where Buck had his last supper. Kinda looks like a man having his ass handed to him, though… To quote Robert quoting me, “Toldja so.” Look, as I wrote in last week’s column in paper version of Unfair Park, Buck…

Silver and Gold

You get the sense from the new Sports Illustrated that Jerry Jones wanted T.O. to B.L.O.W. when he signed him as a Cowboy. As expected, all things considered, the new issue of Sports Illustrated has a feature about the Dallas Cowboys’ week that was; something to do with T.O.’s O.D…

Buck Off

Texas Rangers owner Tom Hicks has canned manager Buck Showalter, according to KTCK-AM (1310). I believe Richie wrote on August 24 that Hicks had hired the wrong man, which means he fired the right one when he gave Buck his walking papers, likely last night during a confab with general…

Getting Our Philly

Our old pal and colleague John Gonzalez, who abandoned the paper version of Unfair Park for Boston magazine, sends this missive about the doings in his hometown of Philadelphia, where, word has it, there is some kind of big football game to be played this weekend. John? “Eagles fans are…

German Engineering

Dirk Nowitzki, like the rest of us, can’t believe basketball season’s already here. He just wishes he were in Germany, not Denton. Let’s hope Dirk Nowitzki’s first official act as a member of the 2006-’07 Dallas Mavericks isn’t an omen. During Monday’s media day at the American Airlines Center, the…

The Cotton Bowl Ain’t No Kyle Field

Even a good Longhorns fan has to acknowledge that Kyle Field’s one of the greatest college football venues ever. The Cotton Bowl, not so much. For a year now, Mayor Laura’s been banging the same drum: If, which is to say when, the annual Texas-Oklahoma game finally leaves Dallas and…

Gurode v. Haynesworth

By now you’ve seen the disturbing video of Tennessee Titans lineman Albert Haynesworth violently and intentionally stomping on the face and head of helmetless Dallas Cowboy Andre Gurode from Sunday’s game. (And if you haven’t, it’s below.) In the aftermath, Gurode got 30 stitches. And Haynesworth should get sued. At…

You Know What They Say About Small Packages

Well, for one thing, they contain tiny gifts. Or dynamite. Or the new, sleeker model of Dallas’ Only Daily. With Byron Nelson’s death and Terrell Owens’ accidental non-suicide attempt, this week provided an immediate Litmus test for the post-buyout Dallas Morning News’ SportsDay section. And, like we feared, bigger was…

Lord of the Pings

This is the Byron Nelson most of us never knew–the young, strapping champ on his way to becoming the legend with whom we were all familiar. There’s plenty of other news in the sports world than what Terrell Owens was or wasn’t trying to do 36 hours ago, though you…

Déjà Boo

This much we know after yet another disappointing baseball season: Saturday Night Live reruns are way funnier than Texas Rangers reruns. Wanna see shortstop and All-Star Game MVP Michael Young giggle? Turn on SNL’s “more cowbell” skit before last Sunday’s home finale against the Cleveland Indians and watch him double…

T.O.: Oops.

Really, does this look like a guy who wants to kill himself? As expected, Terrell Owens just addressed the media at Valley Ranch and claimed he didn’t attempt suicide. He never said he was depressed, never swallowed 35 pills, never got his stomach pumped and, furthermore, plans on playing Sunday…

T.O. to T.A.L.K. Maybe. Probably.

Guess whose life is not really an open book. Go on. Guess. It’s one thing for Cowboys coach Bill Parcells to act like he didn’t know the name of Terrell Owens’ book last summer, but it’s almost criminal for him to show up today at Valley Ranch today and tell…

T.O. to T.A.L.K.

T.O.’s supposed to talk in about five minutes, which is good, since coach Bill Parcells just said at his press conference: “When I find out what the hell is going on, you will know.” There was quite the scene assembled at Owens’ Deep Ellum condo about an hour ago: agent…

Re: T.O., O.D.

Now comes word that T.O. just left the Baylor Medical Center, giving a thumbs-up but no comment to waiting reporters before jumping into an SUV and being driven back to his downtown condo. The seemingly premature release seems to minimize the “attempted suicide” theory. Or does it? –Richie Whitt…

Re: T.O., O.D.

A weird story keeps getting weirder. KXAS-Channel 5 sports anchor Newy Scruggs, one of the few local media types to have a sit-down with T.O., is reporting, as is Dallas’ Only Daily, that T.O.’s publicist, Kim Etheridge, says Owens was not trying to kill himself. Newy, who talked to Etheridge…