Good/Bad Art Collective hosts its first benefit concert of 2000 on February 4 at Dan's Bar in Denton; from what we understand, it will involve a beauty pageant consisting of members of the four participating bands: Budapest One, Baptist Generals, Little Grizzly, and Asphalt the Recorder. The show begins at 9:30 p.m., and the contestants will compete in the usual categories (evening gown, swimsuit, and talent), judged by Good/Bad members. The contest takes place between sets, and the winner will be crowned by special master of ceremonies Jon "Corn Mo" Cunningham. We're not sure about you, but after watching Budapest One frontman Keith Killoren serenade a group of five people on a frozen porch off Lower Greenville -- complete with his trademark, crowd-pleasing leaps off of the highest object available -- we're pretty sure he'll take the talent portion of the proceedings. But he is from Wisconsin, pretty much nullifying his chances in the swimsuit competition. So, all bets are off...

Good Records, the retail arm of the record label-management-booking organization started by the members of Tripping Daisy, opens for business on February 7. The store, located on Good-Latimer near Swiss Avenue, will hold its grand opening a month later. Check it out...

Finally, those "Zac Crain of the Dallas Observer says, 'I love cock! I mean...Caulk!'" fliers are relevant again: Caulk will release a posthumous live album in late February, featuring songs recorded at the group's farewell show on October 8, 1998, as well as studio versions of all six songs from the band's debut, Learn to Take. One Ton Records boss and former Caulk frontman Aden Holt recently finished mastering the disc. Can't say that we were ever fans, but for those of you who pledged Fraternity of Noise, it's a chance to do it again. We're sure we'll have plenty more to add when the album hits our desk. And then some of you will too...

Speaking of which, if any of you would like to personally air your grievances with the Dallas Observer music critics, may we suggest tuning in to Scene Heard: Dallas Observer Radio, our weekly Internet-only "radio show," which airs every live Tuesday at 4 p.m. and is available on archive the rest of the week. Just head to the Observer Web site (www.dallasobserver.com) or www.broadcast.com/music/shows/sceneheard for one solid hour of new, rare, and obscure music, and even more obscure jokes. Or, as we like to refer to it, "hangin' with the Happy Fun Time Posse." Don't be scared by the relentless threats by one of the show's hosts to "shank" the other one, because it's all in good fun...at least we hope it is. You can call us at (214) 748-2488 and tell us just how much you think we suck, or don't, depending on your mood. We can also be reached at [email protected], in case you're not the confrontational type. We'd prefer it if you called, however, because it saves us the trouble of reading through a full e-mail inbox of letters titled "You are such a pussy," written by close, personal friends of Pantera. Start listening now, because the plugs will only get more shameless. And no, we're not kidding.

Send your middle-name guesses to Street Beat [email protected]. The list begins with Dale.