I gotta tell you something, readers. I haven't really followedThe Voice, NBC's singing competition show
It was never a conscious decision. I just haven't really followed reality shows since the first couple seasons of Survivor. I guess, as a writer, I want to support my peers who work on scripted shows.
Anyway, recent news changed my view on The Voice from indifference to a slight grudge. Last week, a tweet on Rihanna's account announced that Cee Lo Green dropped out of opening her "Loud" tour, which, by the way, is stopping by American Airlines Center tomorrow night. The tweet cited Cee Lo's commitment to The Voice as the reason for his departure, so it's probably the show's fault Dallas won't see him live. But I digress.
As a tie-in to the show, judges Christina Aguilera and Adam Levine (and Levine's band Maroon 5) and performed together their new single, "Moves Like Jagger," a few weeks ago.
The studio version of the track sounds sorta like that European disco-house stuff the duo Daft Punk ushered into popular music. It sounds good, actually. And if it had the disco slap-bass, it would sound a lot better.
As good as it sounds, though, this track trips on the cord a few times.
For instance, the chorus details the art of seduction in a weird order. Aren't you supposed to move like Jagger on the floor to charm your target and then kiss till you're drunk?
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Worse, the great Xtina just gets just one verse in this track. Someone probably thought to give her fewer lines so she wouldn't mess them up like she did at the Super Bowl. Thing is, if Hook on Phonics taught us anything, it's that Xtina's only ever gonna improve if she gets more lines to hone her memory.
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The last problem here? The titular reference to Mick Jagger. It didn't work when Ke$ha tried that in "TiK ToK." It doesn't work in this track either. Cultural references really only work in hip-hop, prime-time cartoons, and blogs.
Oh, and it doesn't help that this whole thing reeks of reality show promotion.
So, as it stands, "Moves Like Jagger" is getting voted off the island.