How can we miss you… …if you won’t go away, Paul Coggins? It seems that every three months a new rumor crops up that the Dallas-based U.S. attorney is heading off to greener pastures somewhere — a judgeship, a promotion, something. “He’s going to one of those intensive Spanish-language seminars,”…

In his own defense You would think that three death-penalty prosecutions and, finally, a no-contest plea from Kerry Max Cook would be enough to satisfy prosecutors in Tyler, who are ever looking for a way to repair their reputations as doers of justice. Yet the Smith County District Attorney’s Office…

Truth hurts Mike Howard, president of local publishing company Ringtail Productions Ltd., thought he had a pretty good deal with the nonprofit Irving Schools Foundation. The foundation’s board agreed to distribute his company’s book, Just Gimme a Zero! Teaching From the Trenches by semi-retired Irving Independent School District teacher Mary…

What’s the frequency, Abby? Abby Goldstein spent Tuesday morning fielding phone calls from friends who wanted to know just why her radio station — KKZN-FM (93.3), otherwise known as The Zone — was broadcasting audio from old Bob Newhart Show episodes. She had no idea. Goldstein, a longtime fixture in…

Try, try again It took only 22 years, three trials, and a long stretch on death row for a man who is likely innocent to be released from prison. Now another Tyler grand jury is ready to look into the Kerry Max Cook case. This time, they’re starting by reading…

Cover up They’re the hottest act in country music, selling seven million albums and winning armfuls of golden awards. Now it seems that the Dixie Chicks have gotten too big for Texas Monthly. The magazine wanted the Chicks for the cover of the September “Texas Twenty” issue, which hits the…

Bailon for the defense Word from The Dallas Morning News is that the editors there would like to find — then gut, dress, and eat — whoever has been leaking to Buzz internal newsroom memos concerning the controversy over Belo Corp.’s decision to invest in the arena and the Mavericks…

Deafening silence The cone of silence has descended on The Dallas Morning News after last week’s Buzz, a reprint of a scathing memo from the daily’s three City Hall reporters complaining about the paper’s coverage of the Belo Corp.’s decision to invest in the Dallas Mavericks and the arena. Buzz…

Trouble in paradise Think the Belo Corp.’s decision to pay $24 million cash for 12.38 percent of the Dallas Mavericks and a 6.19 percent share of The Arena Group reeks of a conflict of interest? You’re not alone. Someone from The Dallas Morning News, which is owned by Belo, anonymously…

Spanish flyways You’ve probably seen them: those sneaky ads disguised as articles that appear in newspapers. “Scientific breakthrough: Miracle drug melts pounds away,” the headline says, and there above it in tiny type is the word “advertisement.” Well, we looked in the August D magazine for the word “advertisement” on…

Judge not Your mother always warned you, girls. Once you get a bad reputation, you’ll never shake it. Just ask visiting District Judge Candace Tyson, who once again came in dead last in the Dallas Bar Association’s judicial evaluation poll. Every two years, the association quizzes local lawyers about their…

Hold these balls Guess it could have been worse. In the NBA draft last week, Dallas Mavericks head coach-general manager Don Nelson picked an 18-year-old kid and a 7-foot-1 Chinese player named Wang Zhi-Zhi. So much for the saying, “He has a [politically incorrect term for Asian’s] chance of playing…

Hallelujah Even Buzz isn’t averse to a little prayer when our back is against the wall. This usually happens on Tuesday, long after deadline, when our editor asks us whether this column is ready yet. “Just a minute,” we lie, then dash off a quick prayer, hoping for something –…

Enough for a ticket? It’s easy to think Fredrick “Lico” Reyes is joking when he tells you he’s suing the Texas Rangers for 35 bucks. Hard to take seriously a man who sends legal documents accompanied by photos of himself dressed as a construction worker (named Manuel Labor) and a…

Was it something we said? For the record, we here at the Dallas Observer do not have cooties. OK, maybe that statement is a bit broad. Let’s just say that none of the people we let speak on our behalf in public has cooties as far as Buzz knows. So…

Observer to U.S.A.: Don’t hate us Seems we’ve done more harm than good. That is, if you believe the dozens of readers who have sent us thank-you notes in recent weeks, expressing their gratitude for getting Rocco Pendola fired from KTCK-AM (1310). Now, we never took credit for getting Pendola…

Love for sale Coming up with high-quality, industrial-strength humor week after week is not easy. It takes wit. It takes diligence. It takes bribes. But sometimes God and the fax machine provide the straight lines just when the well runs dry. The latest manna from heaven comes from “soul mate…

Is everybody happy? It took some time, some help from Dallas City Councilman Al Lipscomb, and complaints from one royally P.O.’d resident, but at last someone at City Hall has decided that having semis rumbling through a city park is not a good idea. Seems obvious, you say? You poor…

On a bill and a prayer Texas legislators appear to be taking kindly to the complimentary subscription to the Dallas Observer they began receiving this year. Some say they actually are reading the articles, even the long ones. One story causing a stir in Austin is “Holy Handouts” (January 21)…

Dysfunction junction “Are you a member of the NAACP? If not, why not?” asks the voice of Dallas branch not-quite President Lee Alcorn on his office answering machine. Good question. Here’s a good answer: because our own family is plenty dysfunctional. We don’t need to pay dues to join another…

Good council hard to find Watch out. Buzz is getting literary again. This time it’s Flannery O’Connor, who wrote: “She would of been a good woman if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life.” A psychotic killer in the short story “A Good Man…