IMAX movies look a little too realistic, if you ask us. We once attended an IMAX movie with our elementary school class, only to flip out and run away crying while the opening “helicopter” sequence played before the feature. Hey, as 7-year-olds, we weren’t down with the illusion of hovering…
It’s never too early to learn to properly schmooze with the overpriced, crusty elite of America. But the first lesson doesn’t revolve around manners, business ethics or even the school of hard knocks—the key lies in a firm, solid grip on the shaft, and luckily, kids as young as 4…
The Green Mountain Energy Parade of Homes at the Bluffs at Winding Creek in McKinney made us feel like the biggest idiots on the face of the planet. The event’s name prompted us to wonder aloud, albeit for only 1.57 seconds, “They seriously plan to drive a bunch of model…
It’s easy to feed a shark. Take him out for the best Peking duck in town, follow with a trip to a strip joint where you buy him two lap dances and five shots and end with his favorite flavor of gelato and an earnest promise that you’ll have the…
Ejiofor plays Simon, aka Lola, a flamboyant drag queen who gets to sing show tunes, issue snappy putdowns, and look fabulous. (He is not, he explains, a transvestite, because while drag queens look good in a dress, trannies “look like Boris Yeltsin in lipstick.”) Lola is also nursing some deep…
If some religious extremists in India had gotten their way, the gorgeous fury of Deepa Mehta’s Water never would have reached the screen. As it is, these self-appointed censors shut down the production for years by staging demonstrations, torching Mehta’s sets and threatening her life. Eventually, the filmmaker moved her…
Ever sat through a show thinking you’ve seen and heard it all before? The derivative tunes, the hackneyed lyrics. The creative duo Eric Rockwell and Joanne Bogart had–too many times–before deciding a few years ago to take out some comic revenge by writing the four-actor off-Broadway hit The Musical of…
Winter Passing (Fox) Try this, should you be inclined to rent this downer from writer-director Adam Rapp: Skip from chapter to chapter and see whether they all dont begin with exactly the same image, accompanied by exactly the same sound. There is always someone (usually Zooey Deschanel as a would-be…
Mom always says that videogames rot your brain. Hell, some say that Grand Theft Auto trains kids to kill. So Nintendos claim that its new portable offering, Brain Age: Train Your Brain in Minutes a Day!, actually makes players smarter has been received with a mix of curiosity, cynicism, and…
All Youve Got (MTV) American Soldiers (Velocity) The Big Valley: Season One (Fox) Con Air: Unrated Extended Edition (Buena Vista) Crimson Tide: Unrated Extended Edition (Buena Vista) Doogal (Weinstein) Duma (Warner Bros.) Funny Games (Kino) Garon Stupide (Picture This) Hill Street Blues: Season Two (Fox) My Mothers Smile (New Yorker)…
The Old West has vanished, John Wayne is dead, and–this just in–the two most famous ranch hands in America are gay. But there would be no point in telling any of that to Harlan Fairfax Carruthers, the deceptively charming protagonist of Down in the Valley. Like the anachronistic cowboy Kirk…
At this late date, it’s hard to tell one digitally rendered talking animal from another. Madagascar blends into Ice Age looks like A Shark’s Tale sounds like Shrek might as well be A Bug’s Life turns into Antz feels like Chicken Little could be Over the Hedge, which is really…
You know it’s hard out here for a screenwriter. You’ve got a surefire hit on your hands–an adaptation of the runaway best-seller The Da Vinci Code–and yet it’s all about talking and solving cryptic riddles, which isn’t exactly suited to the visual medium. It’s also a book that depends on…
After writing this, I’m pretty sure I’m going to have to turn in my Man Card. (And yes, of course I have one. Don’t you?) When I found out Michael Cunningham was coming, I wasn’t necessarily excited, but thoughts quickly flashed to the brilliant movie version of his book, The…
Ush on the Rocks cheerfully purports to deliver “a brand of comedy that you won’t find anywhere else in Dallas.” As weak and predictable as most Dallas comedy cavalcades are (I’m looking at you, Section 8), such a proclamation is analogous to an Eskimo bragging about being the best wind…
Normally the terms “repetitive” and “inflated” aren’t necessarily used in the most positive of ways. They sound more like descriptive words for ‘tween dialogue or Top 40 pop music, but when applied to the paintings of Charlotte Smith and the sculpures of William Cannings respectively, the terms denote specific style…
The ladies feel my pain: You’re strolling down Lower Greenville one evening, clad respectably in appropriately fitting clothing, and a couple of jerks in a Civic crawl by, hollering out the window. They’re spouting gems like, “Wassup, baby?” and “Y’all need a ride, WOOOHOOOOHAHAHA?!” I know that it takes all…
Though many of us are too young to remember it, the shockwaves from the 1960s integration of DISD are still being felt in our community, and while race relations in our city are certainly more cordial these days, they’re certainly no less complicated. To see just how far we’ve come…
In bizarre stage adaptation news, Little Women—The Broadway Musical comes to Fair Park this week. What was the thinking there? “Hey, Kevin, I was thinking this antiquated 47-chapter weeper about four sisters during the Civil War—get this, one of ’em plays the piano and dies, dude—would really translate well to…
In his new book, Mayflower, acclaimed historian Nathaniel Philbrick explains how the first 50 years of settlement at Plymouth in essence defined America and its subsequent push westward. The book’s subtitle, A Voyage to War, is fitting as Philbrick dispenses with the elementary-school version of the pilgrims’ landing in America…
Napoleon Bonaparte has inspired some extraordinary creations: a great palindrome (“Able was I ere I saw Elba”), a great song (ABBA’s “Waterloo”) and a great pastry (uh, the napoleon). On the other hand, the “little corporal” has become in modern society little more than a caricature, his image synonymous with…
Do the following words mean anything to you? The Arbiter, Master Chief, Cortana, Elites, Brutes and Spartans (not the naked Greek kind). No? Then turn the page, pal. You’re obviously a PS2 fan or maybe even a Gamecube player. You Halo 2 fans, however, should know this: The Universal Collectibles…
