At some point in the career of a band, the members of the group reach an impasse with their relationship and go their separate ways. Of course, there's always money to be made, so the parties involved make the decision to hit the road and play their hits anyway. The only thing is, they do so separately because they can't stand each other. Oops.
In recent years, as the stadium-sized egos of classic rock bands have passed into their golden years, this has become an ever-more-frequent issue. Sadly, it often leads to mass confusion for fan base who don't know which group they should be loyal to and fork over the cash to see. Case in point: some version of '80s metal legends Queensrÿche is playing Trees tonight. Lucky for you we have 5 sure fire tips to help you make your decision.
1. Is the lead singer involved?
This is the "10,000 Maniacs Rule" because if Natalie Merchant is playing in your town the same night at 10,000 Maniacs, you sure as shit aren't shelling out to see the act who isn't performing "Carnival."
Beatles - Penny Lane by hushhush112
2. Who wrote the most songs?
This is simple. You're seeing Paul McCartney and skipping Ringo Starr & His All Star Band because "Penny Lane" is greater than "Octopus's Garden." (Okay. We totally love "Octopus's Garden," though.)
3. Which act has the most original members?
This would help solve the Black Flag vs Flag debate except there have been so many members of the band that you could make the argument that any band you see is actually a Black Flag line-up. One Direction at Madison Square Garden? Congrats, that's secretly a Black Flag show because Harry was the lead singer like one night at a bar when Gregg Ginn ran into him.
(Note: this open a bit of a technicality because, by dint of having one original members, Journey is still Journey. Apparently.)
4. Which act will have it's leader die first?
This mainly goes for bands from the '60s who are trying to capture the last few dollars out there, but hate each other. We call this the "Three Dog Night Rule" because it feels like there are 12 versions of the band out there and they all seem like they're seconds from death's door.
5. Is Mike Love anywhere around?
Fuck Mike Love. Brian Wilson forever. Do not go see the Beach Boys unless you know for a fact that Wilson is there, and the meds are working...
Well, unless John Stamos is going to be there.
