It’s safe to assume that none of the artworks entered in Fort Worth ISD’s Got Gas? contest in May were re-submitted for the Buzzworms in the Backyard art exhibition. Got Gas? was sponsored by the Barnett Shale Expo, which was basically a gas-drilling pep rally, while the Buzzworms contest is…

For those who rarely escape Dallas, it’s easy to forget the diversity of natural beauty in Texas: beaches, forests, plains and even mountains. That’s right. Out in Big Bend country, Texas sports honest-to-God mountains, and they look like you’d expect Texas mountains to look: barren, steep, jagged things that look…

You should have heard the cheer when we were told that Hunter S. Thompson’s cremains had just been blasted into the sky above his Colorado compound. It was a cathartic collective whooping, many of us shaky-voiced on the verge of laughter or tears or both. It was at the Inwood…

Performances by Red Monroe, Kristy Kruger, Sarah Jaffe, and The St. Anthony Gospel Choir, and DJ sets by Sober and Eddie Ruiz are reason enough to attend Art Conspiracy III. The chance to practically steal original works by some of the area’s best artists makes it an annual can’t-miss. More…

Nothing enlivens family holiday gatherings quite like a burlesque routine. My favorite Thanksgiving ever was at the home of my mother-in-law two years ago, shortly after my wife’s cousin, Kelly Ball, completed her latest straight-to-video acting endeavor. Still high on the excitement of a finished project, she gathered an audience…

Before I preview Bootstraps Comedy Theater’s current production, I should disclose one particular facet of my taste in comedy: I never find cross-dressing humor funny. Too many plot gimmicks and cheap sight gags, I guess. For all the laughs I got, the last performance I saw of Twelfth Night may…

Tom Wilson as manure-plagued bully Biff in Back to the Future was my childhood’s idealized bully. He was a cowardly brute, pure stupid evil—barely even a human being. But as an underrated character in an unwatched show—gym teacher Coach Fredericks in Freaks and Geeks—he showed that even an overbearing tormentor…

It’s a tragic historical irony that the spiritual descendants of some of the world’s greatest artists have devolved into so many dullards who’d rather boycott, ban or burn an objectionable artwork than try to understand it. How could this faith that inspired such beautiful creative expression in its early followers…

Considering this item is in a paper funded by ads for titty bars, hopefully nobody reading it is part of Hannah Montana’s target demographic. So assuming you’re clueless, let me explain the Hannah Montana phenomenon: Malibu teenager Miley Stewart (Miley Cyrus, daughter of Billy “Achy Breaky Heart” Ray) has a…

I don’t see how investing in armchairs could possibly be a good idea. Who buys them new? You can find armchairs free near practically any apartment complex Dumpster—if you don’t mind cigarette burns in the armrests, a mild cat odor or using a pair of vise-grip pliers for the footrest…

From Trash to Treasure, an exhibit by the White Rock Lake Museum and Bath House Cultural Center, boasts garden gnomes, computers, a Barney piñata, a golden Buddha and a McDonald’s payroll check from 1988—all found in the lake. Also exhibited is Here Today, Here Tomorrow, Styrofoam artworks by Dallas artist…

Conduit Gallery’s current exhibitions feature three artists whose works bring to light those uncomfortable, embarrassing or intensely personal acts that are either performed in the dark or perhaps ought to be. Sex, politics, religion, reading, writing and watching movies are the themes of art works by New Yorker Annabel Daou,…

Will Rogers, asked during a Dallas visit what to do with the Trinity River, reportedly suggested “Pave it.” Most of the City Council agrees, wanting to rework a voter-approved parkway into a tollway running through the city’s flood plain. According to hysterical campaign propaganda, this is either the only solution…

Butch Lord is no Bill Hicks, but reality-show comic Theo Von is about as funny as a dead puppy. A typical Lord performance includes a few stoner war stories, like being pulled over with weed in his pocket and enjoying the drug dog’s exasperation with the cops who make him…

To call a Shaolin Warriors performance a martial arts demonstration is like describing a symphony as a bunch of musical notes played together. These Buddhist monks offer a peek at ancient death-defying, death-dispensing moves with a show divided into seasons, representing the cyclical philosophy of their religion. Hopefully audience members…

Weimaraners must emit some toxin that causes insanity in humans. Artist William Wegman thought he’d be safe owning a few of the seemingly lovable dogs. Next thing you know, he’s taking pictures and videos of the dogs dressed up in evening gowns and playing the banjo. The people organizing the…

It’s one of those glib icebreaker questions you’ve heard or used. What would you take with you if you only had a few minutes to leave your home? It lets you get to know someone a little better by asking what he or she truly values. Would you grab family…

My first time was at age eight in an old farmhouse. It had a lot of the thrills I now recognize as staples of the experience: the gruesome operating room, the bloody execution chamber and the locomotive barreling toward us. But the creepiest moment of my first haunted house came…

In How Starbucks Saved My Life, Michael Gates Gill, a Yale-educated advertising executive, is on top of the world until he’s stricken with downsizing, an affair, the resultant fun baby, a crumbling family, brain cancer and no health care. When the manager at his favorite black-staffed Starbucks offers a job,…

After a lifetime of expensive, useless visits to Western doctors, homeopathy is tempting. Researching online, I’ve come across some wild-ass homeopathic meds, like this vial from a first-aid kit: Lachesis (Bushmaster Snake) 9x for “black, smelly wounds [and] disease state when body is thoroughly poisoned, great weakness.” Jeez, my Red…

Anytime someone my age waxes nostalgic about our mid-’90s high school years being the “golden years” of alt-rock radio, I want to puke. My gorge rises because two song snippets will run through my head: Ed Kowalczyk hysterically over-emoting, “Her placenta falls to the floor,” during Live’s “Lightning Crashes,” then…