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Till Today, Andrea Grimes Had Never Been in City Council Chambers

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Andrea Grimes, seeking a warm, cozy place in which to curl up before moving south for the winter, is currently at City Hall for those specific use permit yays or nays. Her report, ever-updating, begins here and continues after the jump.

3:56 p.m.: Property owner Billy McCloud is talking. Something about incident reports. "There needs to be some kind of monitoring device for the good neighbor policy." It's not always the bars' fault that someone calls the police when someone does something wrong. He's kinda pissed off and flustered. He told the council he was very proud of them and "don't make any mistakes." No idea what his point is.

3:59 p.m.: Some dude manages property within one block of Club One. "Huge problem with people leaving Club One and congregating in the parking lot across from it." Neighbors can't get a good night's sleep. "Tons of beer cans" left on the property. "We can't directly say that they're part of that." And, "I don't think either of these clubs are the types of clubs that are going to help Deep Ellum recover."

4 p.m.: Barry lives in Expo Park. "I have never understood why people move next to an airport and then complain about the noise of the planes." He doesn't want the Starbucks Brigade to move in. "We don't want to be Addison. We want to be Dallas."

Tom Leppert looks like a skeleton in a nice blue suit. He's doing an uber-hunch.

4:02 p.m.: John Tatum opposes the Double Wide. "I can't emphasize enough to you how important it is you that you hold the reputation of the applicant with regard to ..." That sentence was boring.

Angela Hunt is so hot. I want to doodle on her agenda.

4:04 p.m.: Deep Ellum landlord Don Cass: "Back in the '80s I would let my wife go down there by herself. Right now I am almost afraid to go down there by myself."

4:07 p.m. Deanna Anderson is speaking in support of Double Wide, Minc, etc.: "I feel this city is lacking in identity." (Leppert is staring at the ceiling and listening to someone sitting in Mary Suhm's seat. Apparently Mary Suhm is a gray-haired dude in a navy suit. Has she had work done?)

Twelve out of 14 city council members are most definitely not listening to anything these people are saying.

4:10 p.m.: Robert Bates is wearing a Santa suit. He's talking about a Christmas party. That's all I can decipher.

4:16 p.m.: Angela Hunt is totally looking out for us as they move past the part where people come up and bitch about multiple items. "This has nothing to do with bars." Whew. Earplugs back in. We're on item 67 right now. Party.

4:33 p.m.: Item 69 is taking longer than anything that falls under the numeric nomenclature of "69" ought to take. I've got two hours and 20 minutes left on my laptop battery, and ... oh .... Sarah Dodd is wearing a ribbed, bright turquoise top that really brings out her .... uh ....

4:36 p.m.: Just got a translation on what Robert Bates/Santa said, courtesy Club Dada co-owner Amanda Newman: "I've lived down here for 50 years, please don't take these businesses away." Tear.

4:37 p.m.: Item 71! We're back on bars! Party!

4:38 p.m.: Mike Schiel, owner of Amsterdam Bar, presumably the subject of item 71. "We'd just like to continue to stay in operation."

4:39 p.m.: Next-door neighbor of Amsterdam Bar. Former Navy guy. "Slices of goodness coming out of Amsterdam Bar." Has a 3-year-old and "would not step foot there with her if I thought it was unsafe." And, "This is definitely one of the better [bars.] They have a science fair there annually."

4:40 p.m.: Landlord for Amsterdam Bar. "Never had a problem with them."

4:40 p.m.: Cliff Martinez, patron since the '90s. "It is the site of one of the hottest spots for jazz in this city." "I have traveled widely and have never known anything like this." It is "thriving, lively and safe at the moment." Intellect-o-sexy.

No more speakers on Amsterdam.

4:42 p.m.: Leppert says don't miss the forest for the trees when it comes to Deep Ellum. "Let's keep in mind what we want Deep Ellum to be ... what we need to do, not on individual situations but overall."

4:44 p.m.: Carolyn Davis moves for Amsterdam to be recommended for a three-year SUP .

4:45 p.m.: Mitchell Rasansky on bars in items: 71, 72, 74, 75, 76, 77, 80 and 81 ... has conflict on 78. "We need to take a look here." Cites 180 police calls in "this area." "I think the chicken is out of the hen house on this one." The Deep Ellum contingent in the crowd is not liking this. "People are afraid to go down there." Wants SUPs to be for one year, not three years.

I'm really sure lots of potential bar owners will want to open a business that's not guaranteed to be open for more than a year. That'll definitely help redevelopment. High-five, Mitch!

4:49 p.m.: Carolyn Davis smacks down. "I have done my homework on 71 and 72!" Oh, snap! She's all, Let's not hate on all these bars just because some of them are skeevy, and Rasansky is all, I'm old.

4:51p.m.: Elba Garcia mini-smacks Rasansky down.

4:52 p.m.: Amsterdam granted SUP!

4:52 p.m.: A guy in a hot green Cosby sweater with a hot black beard. This is Ulysses, owner of Fallout Lounge. "I'd like to ask the City of Dallas a huge question: What are you going to do with your history?" Asks all those in support to stand up. Ninety percen tof audience stands.

4:55 p.m.: Angelica Numaro. Another hot green sweater and hot black hair. "A place I can count on to go and have a wonderful experience." Calls Ulysses an "extended family member." Seriously, I'm tearing up over a bar. It's Amanda Newman's fault. "I'm sorry, Mr. Rasansky. Places like this do not give Dallas a bad name." Burn!

4:57 p.m.: Fallout landlady is back. Big ups, Fallout!

4:57 p.m.: Mike is back from Amsterdam. Says Ulysses "has never been anything less than a fantastic neighbor."

4:58 p.m.: Rhetto Jones, Expo Park resident. "They are perfect examples of what can be done when you move into a neighborhood ... and you turn it around with a successful business."

4:58 p.m.: Billy McCloud is back -- thinks the Fallout Lounge is rockin' (paraphrase). Those officers who responded to the 180 police calls. "They're not coming from Inwood and Northwest Highway, Mr. Rasansky." They're all dedicated to safety in Deep Ellum. Burn, redux.

5:01 p.m.: Carolyn Davis recommends three-year SUP for Fallout.

5:01 p.m.: "This club is a very good club," says Rasansky. Now he's getting snippy about what McCloud said about the police officers. He needs a beer. Maybe from the Fallout Lounge.

5:02 p.m.: Fallout granted three-year SUP.

5:03 p.m.: The Bone, item 3 is up. I wanna hear Rasansky speak about his bone.

5:03 p.m.: Bone owner (The Bone Master? Big Boner?) speaks. Dwaine Caraway has a conflict of interest and steps out. Family biz, etc. "Crime is not an issue."

5:06 p.m.: Pauline Medrano moves to let Bone have until January 9 to resolve some parking issues before they're up for reconsideration.

5:07 p.m.: "We want to make sure there's a good mix of businesses to allow Deep Ellum to thrive," says Leppert. Maybe more businesses with the word "Bone" in the title would help. Really, any reason to hear more "bone" at City Hall would be awesome.

5:08 p.m.: Item 74. Michael Donathan -- lives in Mansfield! Represent! Go Tigers! Owner, Elm Street Bar. "We're at the bottom right now. There's nowhere to go but up." Sad face.

5:10 p.m.: Medrano moves to approve three-year SUP for Elm Street. Dwaine Caraway seconds. Stormy Rasansky supports too! Sweetpants, Elm St. Bar.

5:11 p.m.: Mrs. Claus is here. She's wandering around the back of the chambers.

5:12 p.m.: Item 75, Darkside Lounge. Michael, who also owns Elm St. Bar, isn't allowed to speak again. But it gets approved nonetheless. Party on, Darkside.

5:12 p.m.: Item 76 -- received 14 requests against the property.

5:12 p.m.: Barbara Martinez, owns Club One. Lovely maroon suit, gotta be Coldwater Creek. Apparently formerly responsible for the SUP process in the first place as part of a club-owner task force. Be careful what you wish for? "I apologize to the other owners to make this situation like that." Says, "We run a good business." Re: weapons and drugs in police reports. "It was a car that pulled into our parking lot after hours." Off-duty cops took them to jail. "They were not people in the club."

5:17 p.m.: Sherry Martinez, manager of Club One. Maybe don't wear a miniskirt to the next city council meeting, Sher. "We are trying to be a responsible business." Their police reports are higher, she says, because they hire off-duty cops to work there. "We would like a chance to stay open and show you that we are responsible."

5:19 p.m.: Byron Laslow, lives in Oak Cliff. Tall drink of tall, dark and handsome. Works as a promoter for Club One. No police calls on his nights! Props, By. "I'm here to speak on behalf of the Martinez family, who run a great establishment." To Carolyn Davis: "I invite you to come to the club on Thursday, if you'd like to." Heyo, Laslow. Keep your personal business outta here. She's hot, but control yourself.

5:21 p.m.: Speaker, a square white guy, is "frequent patron of Club One." He's even "been on hip-hop night!" Wild and craaaaaaaaazy guy.

5:22 p.m.: Ryan Williams, owns property adjacent to Club One, a design studio. He likes the SUP process. Kthx. K. Kthx. Kthxbye. Finally getting to his point: Security people for Club One park in his lot without asking. But he's totally cool with that, 'cause he's all about security, so no worries now. "I want to know, if I decide to throw a huge party and all my friends park in their yard and put beer bottles in their yard, why I wouldn't be held accountable?"

5:26 p.m.: Sexy beard No. 2 of the afternoon is up now. He never feels unsafe around Club One, and he walks by there all the time to get home. Sexy beard should keep walking to my house. He will never feel unsafe at my house.

5:28 p.m.: Gray-haired nearby business owner: "I do not think this is one of the good bars." Attendants park Club One cars in his lot and charge for them, and does not like it one bit.

5:29 p.m.: Bruce Sams, biz owner near Club One. Also has the parking attendant problem. Discussed with Club One, and no change. "Fifty-five gallon drums would not clear up the beer cans, Crown Royal bottles, left in the parking lot." Believes "it would be an absolute zoo if police were not inside the place."

5:31 p.m.: The Club One saga goes on. And on. And on.

5:33 p.m.: Race Card, played! By Club One employee. "I heard someone say that y'all would be afraid to get out of your cars at 1 a.m. I'm sorry, that sounds like racism to me."

5:34 p.m.: Chris Martinez, fellow owner, husband to Hot Sherry. Insists parking lot is clean.

Oooonnneeeee is the loneliest number that you'll ever doooooooooooooo.

Twooooooooo can be as bad as oneeeee.

5:35 p.m.: "Skinny little white chick" (self-professed) and patron of Club One "wasn't scared" to go on weekends. Club One owners "have, like, welcomed us."

5:36 p.m.: It's decision time ... Police chief David Kunkle is at the podium. David Neumann wants to know if the police reports come from the address or from the city. "Councilman, it's a combination of both ... if there is an offense or some problem with a particular club ... to use the exact location or the club name." As opposed to just being "in the 3000 block." Kunkle says if a police report is tied to a particular venue, it's because the complaint is about someone who was at that venue.

5:40 p.m.: Another police officer is now reading a litany of violent offenses that have occurred at Club One. Lots of "altercations." People being stabbed. Stitches. Not looking good for Club One. Holy shit, patrons "used their hands and feet" to beat up some other patrons. People getting hit in the back of the head. Fistfights.

5:48 p.m.: "I love the club," says Dwaine Caraway. I believe he speaks of "The Club" as in, the idea of the club, a la Plato or Rousseau or some other philosopher-dude. Like the way Noah W. Bailey loves "the bacon" and Tom Leppert loves "the clasping his hands together like Mr. Burns." Oh, snap! "Deep Ellum is dead! We might be having its eulogy today!" So much smacking down. Mmm. "I got a buncha things I wanna say to y'all! ... We're trying to save you, but at the same time, you got to save us!" I believe Mr. Caraway could get an amen if he asked for such.

5:54 p.m.: Now Tennell Atkins is talking about making a task force. Club One folks have got to be shitting themselves right now. Can we get a decision here? Hellooooooo?

5:58 p.m.: Mitcho sez, "We're doing the right thing by looking at each club on an individual basis." Calls Kunktime and another officer back to podium. "There have been stabbings there?" Owner apparently holds hands up in universal sign for "I dunno." Rasansky no likey. "What do you mean you don't know!?" Mitcho sez: "We need to get rid of this bad apple."

6 p.m.: "Lord knows we all need some entertainment in our lives," says Carolyn Davis. I'll say. Got a bottle of Yellow Tail in the car. Whatcha doin' later, peeps?

Apparently, we know what Andrea will be doing: charging her computer, which just died -- just before Club One was denied its specific use permit. She also sends word that Angela Hunt "just gave a great speech," about what we'll have to find out tomorrow. Grimes will also post on Thursday concerning the other events of the late evening. Some of us now have to get to our junior-high class reunions -- I know, sounds wrong to me too. --Andrea Grimes

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