Free Stuff! Free Stuff!

Are You Smart? And a Winner?

Here's the deal. We have a few Very Big Items to give away (hint), but it's getting late in the day, and we still have these Toadies tix and VIP pass to give away. So...we were going to give the Toadies ducats to the first person to send a cogent, diagrammable paragraph using all the song titles from Rubberneck. (This was Andrea Grimes' idea.) Then we were going to give them to the first person willing to sit in a room for an hour listening to nothing but Toadies covers we found on GooTube (like this one, gak). (Noah Bailey, you're a genius.)

Instead, we've decided upon this: You win the Toadies tix if you come up with the best way for us to give up the night's stay at the Belmont Hotel tomorrow. Now, you may be saying to yourself, "Well, that sucks. That means I can't win the Belmont thing now." And you'd be right. But that sucker's not gonna be easy to git. Besides, we're gonna throw in some excellent surprises to the winner of this contest, to be determined by the staff of Unfair Park by Friday morning. So before you leave work, or get out of your pajamas, submit a few idears to yer pals at Unfair Park. Like I said earlier, free Toadies, free Brutal Juice, free beer. And all for the price of some thinkin'. And if we get no submissions, I'm going to the Toadies show myself, then sleeping it off at the Belmont. Stop me. --Robert Wilonsky

And now, drive yourself insane with this...

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Robert Wilonsky
Contact: Robert Wilonsky