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Congratulations, Texas. We cracked a national top 10, and all it cost us was our dignity.
CNBC just dropped its 2026 ranking of the worst states to live in America, and the Lone Star State proudly claimed the No. 2 slot. We lost the gold to Tennessee, which is either a crushing disappointment or a small mercy, depending on how competitive you are about being terrible. Somewhere, a Nashville publication is writing a much more smug version of this article.
Our final tally: 78 out of 290 possible points. That’s a grade of F, for those of you who can’t be bothered to do the math. And before anyone reaches for the “fake news liberal media” starter pack, know that this is CNBC, the network that plays stock tickers like elevator music and blames a slow economy on millennials and Gen Z buying iced coffee.
So, what dragged us down here?
Healthcare: The category we truly own
If Texas has a specialty, it’s making sure you can’t see a doctor. We lead the entire nation in uninsured residents at 16.7%, more than double the national average. We don’t do things halfway around here, apparently, for better or worse.
About 17% of Texas adults skipped a needed doctor’s visit last year because they simply couldn’t afford it. And if you do manage to hang onto your insurance card, good luck finding someone to hand it to. Texas finishes dead last in primary care physicians per capita. Dead last.
Gov, Greg Abbott, ever the hero of the moment, rode in with $56 million in federal grants for rural hospitals — federal money, mind you, from the same government he’s made a career out of railing against. Split across the roughly 31 million people who call this place home, that works out to about $1.80 per Texan. Abbott called it “state-of-the-art treatment for everyone.” A whole dollar and eighty cents each. That’s not healthcare — that’s a vending machine strategy, so don’t spend it all in one waiting room.
Our “strengths,” and yes, that’s in quotes
Every villain gets a redeeming quality, and CNBC generously found two for us: childcare and air quality.
Air quality. That’s the one they gave us. In a state where summer feels like being slow-cooked in a smoker, our reward is that the air is technically breathable while you sit in a two-hour DFW traffic jam with the A/C gasping for its life. Frame it. Hang it in the living room.
The rest of the scorecard reads like a group project nobody wanted to be part of: crime, inclusiveness, worker protections and reproductive rights all landed in the loss column. Five weaknesses, two strengths, one very confused sense of state pride.
The plot twist
Here’s where it gets genuinely Texan. That same CNBC study ranked us No. 4 in the country for business.
So, the message is crystal clear: this is a fantastic place to run a company and a rough place to actually be a person. Come for the low taxes, stay because you can’t find a physician to sign off on your travel plans. We’re building an economy so strong that its workers can’t afford to get sick in it. Truly the Dallas dream.
None of this will change a single thing, of course. Texans have a proud tradition of hearing bad news and responding with “well, don’t move here then.” So, we’ll keep our silver medal, keep our beautiful, breathable air, and keep telling ourselves everything is bigger here, including the asterisks.
