Cheap Bastard

Crossroads Diner: Bacon Got A-Hold of My Soul.

The overall vibe at the just-opened Crossroads Diner is less Bone Thugs Crossroads, more Britney Spears Crossroads. They serve breakfast all day, which is pretty Bone Thugs of them. But they offer frittatas, which errybody knows is ungangster. "But, hey!" Crossroads Diner seemed to say. "We put fuckin' chorizo in that frittata! And we have another one with bacon and blue cheese in it!"

True, Crossroads Diner. Your frittatas aren't some crappy, been-sitting-behind-the-sneeze-guard-all-day La Madeleine crapfest. They're actually really awesome. That red pepper, chorizo and goat cheese one I had was otherworldly. And the fact that there was bacon in it—even though bacon wasn't included on the menu—that shit right there was like Christmas. "Bacon?!?! I didn't even ask for it, but somehow he knew!"

The roasted red pepper, goat cheese and chorizo frittata set me back $8.75, but when I visited, it was the most expensive item on the entire breakfast menu. Everything else was around six bucks. The house-made granola is only $3.95. But if you come here to order that, you're lamer than Skating With the Stars.

Other stuff I tried that was yummy: homemade small-batch buttermilk pancakes and the homemade blueberry waffle (topped with chest-bump-deserving blueberry compote).

I didn't try one, but Crossroads seems to be pretty proud of their sticky buns. My server mentioned them, and the hostess asked if I ordered any sticky buns. They even have a punch card specifically for the sticky buns, so if you buy nine, you get the 10th one free. I didn't order them because there's something that feels weird to me about telling a waitress, "I want sticky buns." Kinda like it feels weird to order The B.L.A.S.T. (bacon, lettuce, avocado, Swiss cheese, tomato sandwich) when you're at Another Broken Egg. "Yes, I'll have The B.L.A.S.T. Now, and also later."

If you're headed to Crossroads Diner for a 3 p.m. hangover brunch, be sure to wear your sunglasses—the restaurant's painted so white I was legally blind for 30 seconds after looking directly at it.

See you at the crossroads. Crossroads. Crossroads.

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Alice Laussade writes about food, kids, music, and anything else she finds to be completely ridiculous. She created and hosts the Dallas event, Meat Fight, which is a barbecue competition and fundraiser that benefits the National MS Society. Last year, the event raised $100,000 for people living with MS, and 750 people could be seen shoving sausage links into their faces. And one time, she won a James Beard Award for Humor in Writing. That was pretty cool.
Contact: Alice Laussade