Comedy

Didn't Have a Date for Valentine's? Win One at the Deep Ellum Dating Game.

Winning is everything. Especially if it can get you a date.
Winning is everything. Especially if it can get you a date. courtesy Deep Ellum Dating Game
If you found yourself alone on Valentine's Day, you're not alone. The whole city is full of people who think there's no one out there in this big, ugly world who's just for them. They are out there waiting for you to walk up and say, "Hiya."

Maybe you're a little shy and worried about getting shot down, or maybe you just need someone to give you a little push. You could get a friend to help, but he or she could rack up a bigger bar tab that you'll have to cover later. You could hire a matchmaker, but chances are you can't afford one because you're still paying off your friend's bar tab.

Any of this sound sadly familiar? Three Links in Deep Ellum has the best solution. All you have to do is get onstage and play the Deep Ellum Dating Game starting at 3 p.m. Sunday, Feb. 18.

Comedians Jade Smith and Drew Lyons will take prospective love seekers on the same path that legendary game show producer (and possible CIA assassin) Chuck Barris took his original Dating Game contestants on more than 40 years ago. Prospective bachelors or bachelorettes will fill out a Google Docs form if they want to step out on the stage.

The contestant will ask a bunch of questions to some other prospective bachelors or bachelorettes and can only judge based on their answers and the sultriness of their voices. Then, the winning couple will get to know each other better by, you know, going on a date together.

The Deep Ellum Dating Game is free and open to the public. Any drinks you buy for that guy or girl you'd like to get to know better come out of your own pocket. Good luck.
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Danny Gallagher has been a regular contributor to the Dallas Observer since 2014. He has also written features, essays and stories for MTV, the Chicago Tribune, Maxim, Cracked, Mental_Floss, The Week, CNET and The Onion AV Club.