Dear Taco Bell: If You Build The Taco Shell Made of Doritos, People Will Come

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Dear Taco Bell,

Don't keep this a secret. It needs to be out there. Surely, there's a lot on the line after the great meat fiasco of 2011, and this could save everything.

Why? Because people will come. People will come, Taco Bell. They'll pull into your drive-through for reasons they can't even fathom (or maybe just because they've been toking weed). "Of course, you can order the taco with a shell made of Nacho Cheese Doritos," you'll say, and people will pass over the money without even thinking about it.

Food Beast and Grub Grade are leaking details and menu options of a new "Doritos Loco Tacos." If the reporting is true, then it's a good world. We all want to live in a world where stoner food synergy is brought to life on a national scale. This is planet Earth, and we own it. We can make it whatever we want. We can stuff a taco inside another taco, and then stuff it in a pizza and then drizzle it with golden flavoring.

We can make this happen. As E.T. made the public crave Reese's Pieces, Taco Bell too can launch the greatest idiotic, non-Mexican food desire of all time. It'll be glorious, and there'll be lines rounding the block. Build it, and they will come.

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Join the Observer community and help support independent local journalism in Dallas.


Join the Observer community and help support independent local journalism in Dallas.