What on Earth Is Going on in J.Lo's New Movie Trailer?

Jennifer Lopez has achieved a lot throughout her decades-long career — as a skilled dancer, a beautiful model and an authentically self-made woman in Hollywood. Some things for which she hasn’t become known? Acclaimed singer, award-worthy actress, Latin person who speaks Spanish or an artistic visionary of her generation.

J.Lo isn’t necessarily the worst singer or actress. The film Selena and the single/video “Jenny From The Block” will forever be cemented in pop culture history. But most of her projects are just ... ok (Yes, with a lowercase "O" and "K"). And being “just ok” is truly OK, as our therapist insists. No one is asking J.Lo to reinvent the wheel in an industry that favors looks over talent.

However, with the recent release of her newest film trailer, it seems the movie-star-turned-pop-artist simply refuses to come to terms with her own mediocrity.

This Is Me … Now: A Love Story, which stars and is co-written by J.Lo, is a romance film set to be released on Prime Video on Feb. 16. The movie is inspired by J.Lo’s upcoming album, This Is Me … Now, a follow-up release to 2002’s This Is Me… Then, that we can't imagine anyone was asking for.

According to its official IMDb synopsis, the film chronicles “A love story like nothing you’ve ever seen from Jennifer Lopez.” That’s it. And despite its release in an age where movie trailers give away the whole plot of the movie, J.Lo’s is one of few that lacks any context, and it desperately needs it. Featuring a disjointed mix of musical numbers, childhood flashbacks, CGI sequences and the promise of star-studded cameos, the 2-minute-15-second video only spurs more confusion.

Prime Video said J.Lo “showcases her journey to love through her own eyes” in the film, which is “a narrative-driven cinematic odyssey, steeped in mythological storytelling and personal healing.” If this is true, one can only imagine what kind of Beatles-level acid trips she was having while writing her supposed genre-mashing masterpiece. The trailer alone looks like a batshit fusion of surrealist perfume ads, so audiences are sure to be in for a ride when the full-length feature hits the small screen.

Despite everything, art is said to be interpretive, so maybe we just don’t quite see J.Lo’s … erm, "creative" vision. While fans and X accounts continue to speculate what the film’s actual plot and purpose might be, we thought we’d share some interpretations of our own. Here’s our analysis of some of the fever-dreamiest shots in J.Lo’s new movie trailer.

Opening shot

J.Lo’s journey starts out looking like any typical romance movie. Looking content on the back of some hunk’s motorcycle, the actress and maker of Glow by J. Lo fragrance rides off into the literal sunset. Her windswept hair is far more kept than any motorcycle-riding woman’s has or ever will be because, duh, she’s J.Lo. CGI waterside sunset aside, the setup of the unrealistic romance expectations is realistic enough for a Hollywood romcom and doesn’t do much to alarm audiences quite yet.

Hallmark wedding scene

As J.Lo’s voiceover monologue goes on to describe how others view her as a weak, hopeless romantic, we see this shot of a typical sweet wedding. While J.Lo’s questionable bridesmaids' outfit choices may start to set off some minor red flags, the scene is still unassuming enough to pass as a normal romance movie.

We travel to Steampunk Land

And here’s where we start losing the plot. What does a steampunk factory full of dancing line workers have to do with J.Lo’s journey to find true love? This is the first of several places where J.Lo decides to pause her monologue, as if the shift in setting is supposed to click somehow. This could be a plethora of things — J.Lo’s character’s place of work, some kind of supervillain hideout, a metaphorical representation of hell. Whatever it is, it’s a great way to keep audiences, and the YouTube comment section, engaged.

A motorcycle crash (also CGI)

By the time you reach this point of the trailer (which, by the way, is only 24 seconds in), it becomes clear that the special effects budget was likely in the ballpark of $1 billion. To up the ante, J.Lo is seen suddenly flying through the air with her aforementioned motorcycle hunk as the bike is thrown into the air. This offers other possible explanations behind the abrupt fantasy-themed shots. Perhaps the writers drew inspiration from countless telenovelas and put J.Lo in a coma, where she experiences dreamlike hallucinations. Maybe J.Lo just wanted to give stunt work a shot. Alas, all attempts at rationalizing J.Lo’s deranged narrative soon prove futile.

Sex addict family intervention

With no further context for the motorcycle subplot, J.Lo enters her home with a Daddy Yankee wannabe around her arms and into a surprise visit from her friends. After sitting her down, the friends reveal their fun little shindig is actually an intervention for J.Lo, whom they believe to be a sex addict. So, to keep you up to speed, J.Lo’s movie follows a (possible) sex-addicted hopeless romantic action star with some unknown connection to steampunk factory workers. Seems simple enough. Did we also mention this comes after a session with her therapist, Fat Joe?

Sex Addicts Anonymous dance troupe

It looks like J.Lo heeds the advice of her loved ones and attends some kind of support group, where she reveals how her heart hasn’t gone to sleep since she was a little girl. But the film doesn’t seem to stay on a serious note for too long. Moments after J.Lo unpacks some of her deepest childhood traumas and fears, the group breaks out into a synchronized dance. Likely tying back into her upcoming album, this is probably a scene to show that music and dance are the true cure to any personal struggle. Call it a "12-step up” program of sorts.

J.Lo visits Steampunk Land in a hazmat suit

OK, she lost us again. So not only is the steampunk dance factory a thing, it apparently also doubles as a nuclear wasteland. J.Lo’s version of Nuclear Scientist Barbie adds a new science fiction-inspired depth to the film. Why is J.Lo visiting the possibly alien Steampunk race? Is this where she’s infected with some kind of musical-inducing radiation poisoning? Again, what does this have to do with her journey for love, and will she ever find it? With an abundance of themes, settings and subplots, This Is Me … Now: A Love Story is looking more and more like a preteen-penned fanfiction. If it underperforms on streaming platforms, J.Lo’s script might at least get a lot of likes on Wattpad.

Even more dancing

Similar to a Bollywood trailer montage, This Is Me … Now shows a number of shots of J.Lo dancing and singing along to her new songs throughout the film. However, the abundance of settings, lighting and coloring makes it look like J.Lo is advertising three separate movies at once. J.Lo dances across her “Dancing with the Stars” wedding, the rose petal-adorned steampunk factory line and something that is best described as a woodland intergalactic planet. Other clips even pay homage to two musical classics that predate J.Lo: Singing in the Rain and High School Musical. This far into the trailer, we’re not sure that even J.Lo knows what this movie is about. But at least it looks like she’s having a good time, which is all anyone can ask for.

Ben Affleck makes a cameo

Any self-respecting Bennifer fan knows J.Lo would give her real-life husband an on-screen cameo. Despite the obvious chances at a guest appearance, the trailer introduces Affleck (or what we can assume to be him, based on the uncanny frowning mug in the background) as if he were a secret character saved for a post-credit Marvel scene. The not-so-subtle “hidden” reveal is about as shocking as J.Lo’s lack of Oscar noms. Still, it’s always nice to see Affleck’s relatable resting misery face, so we’re not complaining.

Crazy-ass cast list

If the chaotic journey of the trailer wasn’t already enough to take in, J.Lo somehow managed to get a cast of A-List stars to sign on to the project. Suddenly, we have less interest in the actual film and way more questions about what happened between shoots. Did Trevor Noah ever kiki with Keke Palmer and Kim Petras? Can we expect a Post Malone and Neil deGrasse Tyson collab anytime soon? Will Jenifer Lewis and Sofia Vergara play charades with Jimmy Fallon for the press tour? The possibilities are endless. Maybe J.Lo does know what she’s doing after all.