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| Coffee |

Get It While You Can: Whataburger's Mysterious Limited-Time Coffee Shake Is a Caffeinated Treat

Whataburger's new coffee shake beats the hell out of a Frappuccino.
Whataburger's new coffee shake beats the hell out of a Frappuccino.
Courtesy of Whataburger
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Whataburger made waves this week when word got out of a new coffee milkshake that came with no guarantees — some Whataburgers said they'd only be sold through this weekend, others claim the promotion could end any day now. As is the case with any proper Whataburger fan, I had to know more. So I tried it.

Ordering was simple enough. I didn’t have to search for the cool creation on the menu since a big sign greeted me at the drive-thru advertising the limited-edition treat, and I quickly lost any speculation I had about choosing from an endless variety of coffee flavors as reality reminded me that Whataburger was not Starbucks. Not even close.

Whataburger’s coffee shake comes in one flavor: Coffee. That’s it.

Still unsure what to expect, I hesitantly reached for the orange and white Styrofoam cup half expecting the smiling, burger joint barista to turn it end over end. But that didn’t happen either, because Whataburger is not Dairy Queen, and this isn't Blizzard country.

At first glance, the java shake’s russet color resembled a weak cappuccino, which caused my hopes to wane. But then again, what had I envisioned? Caffeinated sludge from the bottom of a campfire kettle? I readied my lips for that first sip when the shake’s vanilla aroma slapped me.

I’m not even sure Whataburger’s coffee shake has the strength to cause a brain freeze, but I was in the fight at this point, so I took a big draw on the straw and filled my palate with what might be described as the Rolls Royce of milkshakes. It was a smooth ride over the taste buds and the cappuccino’s hazelnut-like flavor took off slow before delivering its full, comforting effect.

I poked around with my straw for some clumps; there were none. Whataburger’s coffee shake was not thick. But it was cold and creamy, and it had a few other things going for it as well.

The taste was even and comforting. I know it sounds oxymoronish, but the coffee shake was sort of a warm cold, if that even exists. Or maybe the smoothness of its cold made me warm inside — sort of like a white Russian.

At any rate, the famed Texas burger maker has not said how long the coffee shake will be available, so you may want to ride out to Whataburger and give one a whirl.

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