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Best Gay Bar

Buddies II

Ya know how women are from Venus? And how that means that, unlike men, we need more than visual stimulation when it comes to the bedroom? How we get off less on naughty images than our imaginations, and how we need more than just sex. We need foreplay and romance and flowers ...snnnnzzzzzzz. Sorry, fell asleep there for a minute! See, that shit is so 1992. You'll be glad to know the ladies these days are as debauched and exploitative as a night in Bangkok—we've finally claimed our inner perverts! Which brings us to Buddies II. The venerable Maple Avenue watering hole has always been a spot to find ladies who love ladies, but they've upped the ante. Entertainment there goes so far beyond the normal karaoke. Once a month or so, for instance, you can catch the "Barely Legal" stage show, featuring some of the hottest young thangs to ever titillate. There are also recurring shows featuring Dallas dynamite drag kings, the Dukes of Dallas, the most adorable young bois to never pack a penis. And there's the T'n'T event, which...well, you'll just have to see it yourself. And it's not really like Bangkok—it's all in good fun, in a safe and respectful environment. So, see ya, fellas—while you're busy buying those roses, we'll be buying a lap dance.

Best Jazz Club

Gezellig

Based solely on aesthetics, Gezellig should be one of the best jazz bars in the state, let alone Dallas. Its undeniable cool interior with its dark wood floors and soft, colored lights makes for a perfect jazz setting. But is the venue hampered by its location among the booty bars of Lowest Greenville's meat market? Absolutely. Still, the club does its best to gloss over that fact—and succeeds in large part because of its weekly residency with Michael League and Friends. League is the bass player for the 2008 Dallas Observer Music Award Best Jazz Act-winning Snarky Puppy, and with him at the helm on Monday nights you know you're in for a laid-back time. Just make sure to stretch your fingers—for snapping, of course—ahead of time.

  • 2010 Greenville Ave., Dallas, 75206 Map

Best Scenery While Doing a Faceplant

Oak Cliff Nature Preserve

Hidden away behind a retirement home and the Hampton Illinois Branch library are 119 acres of barely tamed wilderness, home to a surprisingly diverse sampling of wildflowers, butterflies, birds and trees. Winding, looping and switching back through the preserve is a multiuse path for hikers and bikers alike. Maintained by volunteers, the park has exciting features including water crossings, ramps and bridges to keep riders on their toes. The preserve has about eight miles of trail, and Dallas Off-Road Bicyclist Association members led by Shadow Johns are creating more all the time. Be alert for hikers and riders coming your way, though, as there are tons of blind corners, thanks to all the trees.

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